self-portrait reading: administration of wills and trusts, chapter 8september 29, 1999
hearing: traffic on johnson st. (yes, you read that right, johnson st.), car alarm going off, the occasional ambulance and the occasional train.
thinking: this feels wierd!
wishing: i knew i was coming over here this morning, so i could’ve brought my little radio and listenend to m&b.
happy ball reading: “you look marvelous!”
link o’ the day: none.
journal o’ the day: none.this is very bizarre! it feels so weird to be back in this house again, sitting at the table in what was the large conference room, after all that packing, moving, unpacking and getting settled in the new building. so, why am i here? did i get homesick for this old place? forget something? no, i am the "chosen one!" i was chosen to return to the old domicile and sit here and wait for the phone guy to come and do whatever it is he needs to do, and for the water guy to come and take away the old water bottles and cooler. we don’t need it in the new place, as we have a reverse osmosis system in the sink in the kitchen. the water guy usually comes around 10-ish, but the phone guy could be anywhere from 8 to noon. charming. i was told to take a good book and settle in for the morning! well, i took a book alright, but i don’t know how good it is! anyway, this was a great opportunity to get my homework done for tomorrow night. at least i won’t have that hanging over my head!
well, things started out quite promising. the phone guy arrived soon after i had. i had barely sat down, and cracked open my book when there he was. he got to work, but was unable to finish due to some problem with the numbers - i don’t know and i don’t care. he had to leave to take care of that and return later. after he left, i just sat there for a few minutes taking in the scene: except for the fact that it’s dark and there’s a sign on the door saying we’re gone, little has really changed. the room I’m sitting in is still furnished: large table, desk, small end table and several chairs. there’s no decorations on the mantle over the fireplace, however, and that’s really the only indication that we’re gone. The reception area still has the sofa, coffee table and a couple of chairs in it, as does the medium conference room. i haven’t checked out the rest of the house. i finish my homework, and wait. i jot down these notes for my journal, and wait. the phone guy returns - it really hasn’t been all that long! - and finishes up the job toot-sweet. i sign his little sheet and he leaves. he’s a cute boy, but much too young for me, i’m sure. he seemed kind-of nervous to be there, but maybe he’s new.
after the phone guy leaves, my curiosity gets the better of me and i have to wander around this empty old house. i go upstairs, i go into all the offices. some of them i'd never been in before - i'd never had any reason to see the resident of that office before. it all looked real strange; abandoned, but not completely. more like someone had to leave in a hurry, and only took the bare necessities. i peeked out onto the upstairs deck. i'd never been out on the deck before; never had any cause to. the bird feeders were still full, and there were several birds enjoying a mid-morning snack. they seemed quite undisturbed by my presence behind the glass, but then, they were probably used to people staring at them. i finished my tour of the upstairs, and went back down. i checked out the front door and back door to see if the water guy had come yet. he hadn't, so i haunted the downstairs.
i peeked in all the offices, but didn't bother going into any of them. they all had some furniture left in them, as did the upstairs offices, and it was just the same old stuff i'd already seen. i paused, however, when i came to the back part of the reception desk. have you ever seen those scenes in movies or tv shows where the character is standing in an empty room, and, when they're remembering the kinds of things that used to go on in that room, it suddenly starts to come alive before them? i can't think of a specific example right now, but i'm sure you know what i mean. well, i had that exact experience standing there. i was right by where the fax machine used to be, behind the desks where the receptionist and the go-fer used to sit. at the end of the hall was our file clerk, and a couple paralegals were in offices on either side of her. this was always a hub of activity, and i often stopped by here to say hello, and catch up on the gossip and news before returning to my quiet, separate office. as i was standing there, i could see the receptionist sitting there all smiles - she's always smiling, but i guess that's part of her job - and can hear talking, giggling, laughing, phones ringing, and doors slamming as people come and go. it was very surreal: a whirl of activity and colour suddenly rushing out of the dim light, whirling around me like a dust devil, then disappearing, noise and colour fading, leaving me, once again, alone.
i went back to the large conference room to begin to collect my things. i sat there for awhile, alone, lost in thought. every creak, click, groan, bump or thump had me up and running to the back door to see if it was the water guy. finally, one time, it was. he took the left over bottles we had in a storage space, then came in for the cooler itself. unfortunetly, the cord was stuck behind a cabinet which was bolted into the wall, so he wasn't able to retrieve it. he'll have to come back for it. after he left, i double checked the front door, then left out the back.
since i had a letter to mail, i made one last trip across the street to the mailboxes, etc, and checked my box at the same time. i just renewed that box for the next 6 months, which probably wasn't the most intelligent thing to do, as it's now way out of my way. but, i didn't feel like changing my address with amazon.com, borders.com or ebay, so i've just left it. i was tempted to go into scolari's, but resisted. i'm going to miss their broccoli cheddar soup, and taco salad fixin's on thursdays. i don't think we're close enough to walk to anything at the new place, although the crossroads center may be close enough, i don't know.
well, the rest of the day was pretty much the same old stuff, so there's nothing really to say about that.