There's a war raging inside me right now. There's the Old Me, who likes clutter and lots of things around her, and there's a New Me, who has only recently emerged, and who prefers clean lines, muted colours and sparse furnishings. The Old Me prefers the comfort of clutter, and feels safer and more secure when surrounded by lots of "things". The New Me feels calmer when she's organized, and likes everything to be neat and tidy, clean and crisp. Although the New Me is pretty much in control right now, the Old Me is still here, and still struggling to keep, keep, keep, while the New Me wants to purge, purge, purge. It's hard to dump stuff I've been hoarding for decades, but I always feel so much better after clearing away the clutter, and the Old Me just sort-of disappears for a while to mope. More and more I think I would really like the Old Me to go away forever, although the thought is a bit daunting: what would happen to her? where would she go? more important, what would that do to me?

I really do want to become more organized, and clear away the clutter in my life, and live simply. Or simply live. Something like that. I've been doing a pretty good job of purging and organizing, and have been enjoying it more and more. Lately, people have noticed this change in me: I seem more focused, more confident, more comfortable in my own skin; happier. I know because they feel compelled to tell me. And, it's true! I am more focused, confident, comfortable, and happy. I never thought being organized and having less stuff around would make me happy, but apparently it does. Then again, it could be the Z.

Along with the rest of my life, I've been wanting to simplify my websites, too. I've been trying for a couple years to combine or coordinate them so they flow smoothly, but so far nothing has worked to my satisfaction. I just have too much stuff! Too many hobbies, too many crafts, too many pictures, too many words, too many interests . . . I really want to use Moveable Type to organize my stuff, but Yahoo! Webhosting doesn't support it, so I've been using Blogger instead. As much as I like Blogger, I still need to have separate blogs for my photoblog and memes, my fitness blog, my reading list, etc., etc. I could move to a new host, but I've been with Yahoo! for years, and I'm comfortable with it. I know how to use it. I guess I should do a little shopping around, just to see if I could get a better deal and have all the programs necessary to run MT.

Then again, I could just dump everything - everything! It would be the ultimate purge: dump my domains, dump my web space, all of it, and just get a little space at Diaryland. Maybe, maybe.

Reading: The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

Classic Book: Pickwick Papers by Charles Dickens.

Previously: Animal Farm by George Orwell.

Listening to: Nothing.

Writing: Nothing.

Gratitude: An Uncluttered Mind